Lakshmi’s Suprabhatam blues has drawn interesting responses from the near and dear. It turns out Appa (mine) was not too gung-ho about it at first . Too Long. Too much about that boy. And I think you are repeating yourselves a couple of times. Who’s Shyamu? Is he for real? And Meenalochani Maami?
Big Brother Subri, said it was good. And he didn’t have any questions about who’s who and what’s what. Probably that’s the reason he didn’t become the journalist in the family. He agreed with me that “the boy” had to be there, since he contributed the gibberish Suprabhatam although he doesn’t know he has done so . He said he didn’t find it too long.
Appa reasoned, “she must have edited it after I pointed it out”. Which I hadn’t.
I was both amused and felt slightly slighted at Appa’s critique , but I concede it could use some editing and re-writing.
Subri thought Tom Sawyer swung a cat and not a rat. They talked about it, and Appa said, she must have changed that for her story. Subri asked him why I’d do that. To protect the identity of the cat? Appa had no answer . I confess I laughed a tad too loudly when Subri told me. It made me feel better about Appa’s honest opinion.
In any case, we checked, and I am elated to report, it was a rat.
I spoke to Appa, and he said may be he ought to go back and read the story again, to better appreciate the contribution of Shyamu to its climax. When I read it the first time, the computer screen wasn’t scrolling properly, and that’s probably why I felt it was long and repetitive , he said.
That’s right. Blaming it on a glitch makes for a happy ending.
Finally, my disclaimer is right there, staring you in the face, even before the story begins if it’s too long, or boring, just remember, it had to be there.
My first story. And my first lesson Criticism begins at home.